Saturday, December 13, 2008
dunno why, feeling emo. i dun except anyone to know what happen or console me. i just felt strange. i dunno izzit wad ppl say like. i mean, he give miie a feeling like i being trap in a cage. maybe i think too much or wadever, but after wad his MSN PM wrote, i felt like a person who cares miie alot has gone. i didn't meant to hurt him, but he just give miie no secure at all. i just wan freedom, i mean, i mysle noe wad i wan and wad i felt, but when he keep asking i just felt like i'm being trap. i dun like this kind of feeling. it really sweet when he concern miie, i really like the everyday 他跟我斗嘴, it just give miie happy, eventhought sometime we will 斗嘴until veri veri serious but we know we are playing. i really like the feeling when he with miie. i really wanna treat him as friend, cause even i myself dunno wad i thinking, how can i possible to know wad i felt about him. i know it hurt when i msg him telling i just wan to be friend with him. i just wan to go back to the past. i just wan to know what him thinking. i just wan him by my side. i know i just too selfish. why i can't trust him and i should noe he keep repeating the same question because he concern miie. but after wad simin told miie he cause his MSN PM, i just worry, i just got a kind of feeling hoping he will come back and by my side. i noe i'm a selfish ppl but he is the one who let miie stop thinking another guy. everytime out of sudden i will think the view when there was miie and him. i mean i really wan to know wad i thinking. i dun wan to give him fat hope. i noe i will be selfish if i ask him to wait. so i rather tell him, i just wanna be friend. Is way better and secure. when we loss a chance really mean no second chance? i just wan to have the view back when our gang ppl went out tgt and he will 斗嘴with miie. i dunno wad that mean. i just noe that he break my view about relationship. he break the mindset that i told myself. i just wan him to give miie space, i just wan him stop giving miie stress, cause i still cannot trust him. i just scare that he will betray miie one day. i noe i'm too exaggerate about a small matter. i noe to u is a small thing but to miie is that wadever i say to someone there is a meaning in it, unless i tell someone by myself. i noe sometime i'm as stubborn as a stone and i too selfish. maybe i too self-protect myself. in my mindset i nv thought of changing myself, and i can't trust u cause u noe my style and we amost everyday 斗嘴 and u like miie andu can say u nv like that girl before when u like her for 3 month and u keep pushing miie to another person when u say u like miie. u just dun gain my trust, u just give miie a mindset u not serious at all and u dun really care about my feeling.
